Time for a little chat
Hey everyone! So for the past few months I have been working on recognizing my potential, loving myself, and ultimately working to create the highest version of myself. On this journey, I have tried many new methods to hone in on that self love, and the following are some of the things I did that personally helped me the most and made me the happiest. Remember, everybody’s journey is different, and just do whatever makes you feel the best! That being said, here are some tips that worked for me:
For Starters, Let’s Switch Up Our Perspective
Lets just get it out of the way and say it because everyone could use a reminder: No one has the perfect life. If you see that “perfect” girl on Instagram or in the hallways at school, put it in PERSPECTIVE. Really think about it, because everyone, and I mean everyone has their struggles. Think about it, but only briefly, about what that person might be struggling with, and then switch it up! Do not put energy into being jealous of someone and then pitying them for their struggles, and rather name three of your own strengths, or three victories for that day. These strengths or victories can be anything from getting a good grade on that test, winning that game last night, or simply that you brushed your hair this morning. Whatever it is, make an effort to put the focus back on the positive aspects of yourself, because you deserve all the goodness this world has to offer.
Remember, You Become What You Say
Just like being negative, the words you repeat in your head (or out loud) will have an impact on you. For a while, negative words would subconsciously fill my head, and without realizing it, I began to believe that I was, “ugly, not good enough, and pathetic”. It was so draining to hear these words in my head each day that finally I asked one of my friends if she had any keys to her confidence. She simply said to me, “When you look at yourself in the mirror, no matter if you had just woken up or gotten home from that tough practice, say ‘I look pretty’”. I know what you are thinking, and at first when I heard her say this, frankly, I was a little confused. But, I put my preconceived notions aside and tried it. Picture this, me in the mirror saying: “You look great”, late at night studying, “You are capable”, at dance class, “You are strong”. These little sayings in my head made a WORLD of a distance for me. I promise positive self talk is the best tool you have in your journey to confidence. If you do not know where to start, here are some affirmations, try to choose three to say each day.
-I am beautiful -I am strong -I am capable -I tried my best -I am kind
Your Vibe = Your Tribe
This piece of advice is pretty basic, but regardless needs to be said. You need to surround yourself with good people who are drama free, make you feel confident, and share similar goals with yourself. If you are constantly being put down by your so called “best friends”, then you need to leave them behind. It might be difficult and take some time to make new friends, but the end game will be so much sweeter. Also, work on your built-in relationships: the ones with your family. Try to spend time talking with your family members each day, because some of the strongest relationships you will ever have will be with those closest to you.
Get A Move On It
When you are feeling stressed or in a bad mood, force yourself to do some exercise. You can walk your dog, go on a run, or even turn on some music and dance around your room. Personally, when I am not feeling my highest self I will pop in my Airpods and go on a long walk by myself or do some stretching/yoga. Whatever movement it may be, your body will thank you because it will recognize that you are doing exercise when you release endorphins, which will automatically lower your stress and ease any physical pain you might be feeling.
Put Down That Phone and Get Some ZZZs
Bedtime and phones should not mix, specifically with apps like Instagram and VSCO. Social media is an awesome way to showcase the best parts of your life; however, it is also a place where jealousy can FLOURISH. For this reason, I recommend about 30 minutes before bedtime, stop going on Instagram, VSCO, or any other app that might make you feel envious of someone else. You can still go on your phone (with night mode of course) to text your besties, watch Netflix/Youtube, or facetime your S/O, but try to stay away from platforms that you know will lower your self-esteem, especially before bed.
Not Loving Where You Are? Get out!
I encourage you to get away from the “spot” you feel the worst. This spot could be your bedroom, for example, where you do your homework. In this case you could begin to do your homework instead in the kitchen. You do not want your bedroom to subconsciously stress yourself out whenever you enter it because of the bad experiences you may have had in there cramming for a test you failed. Also, if the weather permits, PLEASE try to spend a few minutes outside…everyone needs some Vitamin D! Plus, the sun’s magic always boosts my mood. By realizing your surroundings may be dampening your productivity and putting yourself in a new environment, thoughts of negativity will often be pushed to the side.